Parents of an ill Child

How do I explain to my child that I have or they have an illness?

It is essential to choose a comfortable and private setting, ensure uninterrupted time, and explain the situation, treatment, and prognosis using simple terms (visual aids). Emphasis should be placed on the many efforts being made by the medical team.

Young children require more detailed explanations, as they tend to fill gaps in understanding with their own interpretations, often leading to catastrophic fantasies. However, they are capable of processing the information when adults are prepared to offer it, as children are always receivers and transmitters of news.

When a child is ill, parents may experience denial or disbelief, fear, anger, frustration, guilt, and may engage in destructive behaviors toward themselves or others, such as their partner or the medical team. Other common reactions include overprotection, compensation, depression, adaptation, and eventual acceptance.

At COINCIDIR, we support parents in analyzing underlying conflicts to prevent these from leading to a breakdown in the couple’s relationship. These include:

·       Interference from extended family and friends who, despite good intentions, question treatment decisions and generate anxiety or confusion.

·       The tendency to infantilize the patient instead of encouraging personal growth through their own achievements.

·       Feelings of inadequacy in fulfilling the role of “good parents.”

·       Social isolation.

·       Guilt related to external interests such as professional development or social life.

·       Difficulty in assuming decision-making responsibilities, often deferring control to other relatives or authorities.

·       The importance of preserving couple time.

·       Maintaining consistent discipline with the patient.

·       Attending to their own basic needs as parents.